Wouldn’t you like to be able to let go of your bad feelings and feel good? If so, I have the solution you’ve been looking for.
Our emotions are the expression of our body about how much we live according to what we want. If we feel good, our needs are met. If we feel bad, our wishes are partially or entirely unfulfilled.
For many people, the only way to feel better again is to change the external circumstances.
However, this is only a good solution if it succeeds and only until the external conditions change again.
It at all it is only a temporary solution as our well-being always depends on our external circumstances.
But what would happen if we were happy and content, regardless of what is happening around us?
If you have read my article “The Emotional Scale – 9 levels of awareness you need to know to live fulfilled and happy“, you know that there are different levels of consciousness. At lower levels, we feel separated from the world and have an inherent lack. On the upper levels, we feel connected to the world and experience a feeling of inner abundance. We experience this through a high level of energy and a general feeling of well-being.
Now we have to clarify how we get there. A state of consciousness of acceptance and peace cannot be achieved simply by acting alone. On the contrary: Doing something on the outside is unnecessary at all (even if it might be helpful under certain circumstances). The solution lies primarily in dealing with one’s own emotions.
Acceptance – the universal Remedy
An emotion is an energy in motion in our body. In a natural state of abundance and acceptance, this energy can move freely and unrestrictedly until it finally dissolves. If we are in a state of scarcity, we try to hold on to the positive emotions and get rid of the negative ones. As a result, resistance to what is develops, which leads us to prevent the free flow of this energy. It stagnates, and the body stores it in its cells. This is problematic because the quality of our life becomes better the more freely these energies can flow in us.
As long as the resistance is sustained, the energy remains in our body. Now external circumstances can trigger us at any time, activate the emotion, and bring it into our consciousness—each time giving us the chance to dissolve them. If we do not succeed, it is suppressed again until it returns through a similar situation.
Emotions can be dissolved by consciously looking at them, allowing, and accepting them. This is called letting go or releasing. But accepting is often easier said than done. Just think of the loss of a loved one, illness, or major financial problems. Sometimes not so easy.
Here is my list of 8 techniques that will finally free yourself from your negative emotions.
1. Be the Witness
As simple as it sounds, but sometimes that’s all it takes. Just sit down, close your eyes, feel into your body, and be the observer of your emotions. Just let it all happen.
To help you do this, ask yourself: “What am I feeling right now?”, “Where do I feel it?” and “How does it feel?”. Be curious like a little child and perceive whatever shows itself to you. If you can’t feel anything, that’s fine as well. Just wait and keep watching. If you feel inner resistance, see if you can accept and observe it.
If you succeed, you will notice how your emotions gradually change and become lighter after a short time.
For many of us, it is not so easy to perceive what is going on inside us. As an exercise and also as a regular practice, I would, therefore, like to recommend this guided body scan meditation. It guides you through your whole body so that you can focus entirely on observing what is—a great help, especially in the beginning.
2. Sedona Method
Another way to let go of emotions is to ask yourself the following questions:
What am I feeling, and can I accept it?
Can I let it go?
Would I let it go?
After you have asked yourself these questions, become an observer, and witness what is happening inside you. After a short moment, you should be able to perceive a change. You can repeat these questions with every new feeling that comes up afterward.
It is not about answering all questions with “yes” and “now”. It is about being completely honest and congruent with yourself. As soon as you are completely honest with yourself, without making it right or wrong, the feeling will change.
3. Modified Sedona Method
Alternatively, a modified version of the questions can help to let go of an emotion:
What am I feeling, and can I accept it?
Can I let it go?
Can I let go more?
Can I let go even more?
And even more?
… (until release)
Feel inside yourself after each question. Witness what is and what changes.
Little by little, the feeling should feel lighter and lighter.
4. Amplification of the negative Emotion
As illogical as it may sound, but the conscious decision to make a feeling stronger can free you from it.
Increase the emotion as much as you can until it changes or dissolves.
By consciously choosing to make the feeling stronger, you stop wanting to get rid of it—you stop resisting it. Remember my words from the beginning. It is about breaking down all resistance to allow change.
5. Polarity Release
For a lot of circumstances and feelings, we can easily define opposites. There is light and dark, positive and negative, happy and sad, strong and weak, healthy and sick, etc. We could continue the list endlessly.
If you have a negative feeling, find the opposite, positive. It can help you to think of a situation where you have felt this way before. Then switch back to the negative feeling. Repeat the process until the difference in the perception of the opposites dissolves, and both sides feel the same. Take your time and allow yourself a moment on each side to consciously perceive how it feels before you turn back to the other.
6. Replacing by Love
Feel inside yourself and become aware of the present feeling. Then ask yourself the question of whether you can replace the current emotion with love. Witness what happens with the emotion. Don’t force it. Just let it happen. If, after a while, nothing happens, just repeat the question and watch your emotion.
It may be that nothing happens at first or that the feeling does not change directly into love. Do not judge it. Just stay with it. With patience, you will get there.
7. Diving into the Emotion
Feel where the emotion is in your body. Imagine it like an oversized ball and start to move towards the center. As you go deeper and deeper into the core, feelings, memories, images, and sentences may appear in your head. Just let them pass you by and continue. Little by little, the feeling will feel lighter and lighter until a state of peace is reached.
A negative emotion often expresses itself as tension or pressure in a certain part of our body. Imagine a tube at this position through which it can flow out. Little by little, the emotion should feel lighter and lighter until it dissolves completely.
It’s like Weight Training
What I am describing here may seem simple. But don’t be surprised if it doesn’t work at all in the beginning or if you don’t get the effect you want right away. You can think of it as strength training. If you have never trained before, you are probably not able to lift big weights. So you start with small weights and increase them steadily. After some time, you can use weights that would have been entirely too heavy for you a few weeks and months ago.
Do not expect that you will be able to resolve deep-seated wounds and traumas immediately.
Start with seemingly banal little things that disturb you in your everyday life. After a while, you should notice that you can let them go more quickly, maybe even right at the moment they happen. This is a habit that I would recommend to each of you because there is nothing that justifies feeling bad about it.
At the same time, you can gradually take on issues that are more difficult for you. When deciding which topic is currently suitable for you, ask yourself how severe it feels on a scale of 1-10 (1 does not burden you, 10 is completely overwhelming). Find topics on a level of 4-5 and solve them.
This may seem too little to you. But it is not the goal to always solve topics in the 8-10 range. That would be like daily training with maximum weight. Through repeated practice, your capacity to handle stronger emotions will increase, and a 4-5 today may soon only be a 2-3, so you will automatically look at more severe emotions, even if it doesn’t seem that way to you.
Letting go is an Art
Don’t expect that just because one technique worked today, it will work again tomorrow. Once it becomes a means to an end, it stops working. That’s why I would call “letting go” an art rather than a science. So feel inside yourself and pay attention to your intuition. It knows what it takes to deal with what is going on at this moment.
Don’t put yourself down
As indicated in the previous chapter, at first, you may not be able to change or completely dissolve a negative emotion. Do not judge yourself for this. It would only make it worse in the end, since this is just a new negative emotion that you are holding onto.
It is about stopping resisting what is. It is about letting go of the need to change anything at all. Accept what is, even if it means to accept that the feeling remains for now. As soon as you can do so, you can wait for it to change.
I wish you the greatest possible success in applying these techniques. Used correctly, they will change your life for the better.
If you have any further questions, just contact me, and if you like what you read, please share it with your friends. It could also change their lives for the better.
Live authentically! Be great!